Mental Well-being. What does Kindness mean to me?
An act that makes a difference, making someone happy.
You can create a small gift by simply being you,
I believe I am a genuinely kind person and I am blessed to know lots of genuine kind people. They each contribute to my #mental #well-being. which in turn affects positively my confidence and self-esteem.
However, we may give into the temptation of allowing ourselves to be spiteful. This in turn will create a #low mood, a feeling of #anxiety, low self-worth, fatigue … No, not you perhaps?
How about reflecting on your recent conversations, perhaps you have described people as mad, bad, mental, fat, the bible basher, skinny … and so the list of disparaging remarks goes on.
Perhaps you are an “enabler”? Someone who will listen to another person making awful remarks without you challenging them.
When you do stand by and listen, you are “colluding” with their behaviour, you are giving them approval and therefore encouraging more of the same.
When you speak negatively of others, I believe it stays with you, like a coat of mud you don’t want to wear and it simply gets bigger and heavier, causing mental ill health, but you can’t take it off. Each day you are adding more and more mud to it – it’s heavy isn’t it? It’s tiring, your #mind full of #negativity causing huge #fatigue and possibly isolating you.
It will affect your self-esteem, confidence, fill you with anxiety and leave a door wide open for depression to move in and it will you know, depression is sneaky, it doesn’t matter who you are, where you are or what you do, depression does not discriminate. It simply wants to get you the dark place of mental ill health.
I hear your offers of defence, “but I don’t say that to them … I wouldn’t dream of it…” that is an extremely poor excuse, you are giving yourself permission to make disparaging remarks about others. So why say it at all?
So what do I suggest in order to remove that hideous mud coat you wear? And also how will you increase your own mental #well-being.
Kindness and Improving your own mental well-being. It has to start with you, gifting kindness from your heart to yourself.
Learn to love yourself and realise what an amazing, autonomous human being you are.
Consider the good that you have achieved, could achieve and consider the significance of the gifts you will be able to share with others, thereby increasing their mental #well-being as well as your own.
Feel good about you and build up all the positives about yourself, just like you would, For example, I love my hair, I love my smile, I love my height, I love me.
Feel good about the times you have helped others, it feels good doesn’t it? Topping up your mental #well-being.
When you love you and be kind to you, it is then easier to love others as you will be exuding the energies of love and kindness naturally, it becomes a way of being, a really excellent habit to have. Your own mental #well-being will be in a healthy state.
By going through this process and reflecting on your conversations, you won’t use awful descriptive words any more, they will become less and less, the negativity of the conversation will disappear. Your mental well-being increasing as you go.
People who are in your circle will use negative and hurtful phrases around you, less and less, it just happens.
Perhaps one day you will be brave enough to make a stand, “I really value your friendship, but I don’t agree with … Let’s change the subject…” Anyway, something like that.
No confrontation, simply a calm statement about how you are reacting to the information shared.
While this transition is going on, you may look at your social circle and realise that you are in the wrong one, or that you may have to distance yourself from someone. This will happen and yes it hurts, but to finally have the right people in your life, that’s massive!
This is not an overnight process, I started this at the age of 41, I am 50 now, and I truly believe I do have the right relationships in place, for fun, love, support, kindness and these each feed into my mental #well-being as I do to theirs.
Reflection is necessary to learn how to connect & increase positive well-being
You will be attracting like people whilst you change, this may cause you some confusion, but trust your heart and be kind to yourself. It’s not something we get right straight away, it’s something you will learn and develop, topping up your mental #well-being.
So I would suggest as a starter, being kind to you. Give yourself space, find tranquillity in your garden, in the local park, in your lounge.
Soak up the noises surrounding you, let them fill your head and simply be, if it has been a while since you have done something like this, you will find noises that make you smile; the children in a local school or park, dogs playing, birds tweeting, trees or bushes rustling. You head will enjoy this so much, the mental well-being radar going up.
It is amazing to allow ourselves to experience the moment and simply be.
I truly hope your mental #well-being is well or at least on the mend, and I sincerely hope you take off that extremely ugly, heavy mud coat! It stinks!
It is #Time to Change so here’s a link to an interesting 5 a day article that will help you, enjoy the read:
Love Me x